Dairy Air

I realize it's already been a while since my last post. I've had numerous random thoughts recently that would've been blog-worthy, but I just never got around to posting them. Thoughts like, I can always tell when my mom goes through cleaning her e-mail inbox, because I get to read all her many, many forwards. I swear, the woman is trigger happy when it comes to that blasted Forward button. Thoughts like, My knees and butt really did not appreciate my most recent snowboarding trip... Especially when I got dragged up that black diamond. Thoughts like, I really miss all the people that I left behind in the Bay Area...but I'm feeling more and more at home in this new place, with new friends, a new church, and new hobbies.

Wow, I could get deep with that last thought. But not this time.

Instead, I'm sharing with you all a gem of a Facebook note that I wrote while at home with the family for Christmas a couple months ago. The note was going to show up here sooner or later, to prove to you my love for immature humor. Anyway, back to the original subject:

Dairy Air

So, I'm home for the holidays. "Home" is a funny term because I didn't exactly grow up here, and, in fact, I have few friends in the quaint township of Elk Grove Village...few in the greater Chicagoland area, in general. So, unless a random friend (Michael Lin) or collegiate a cappella group (Testimony A Cappella) chooses to visit the area, I all too frequently find myself taking advantage of the free DVD rentals at our local library to pass the time and catch up with pop culture.

Over the past few days, I have watched:
War of the Worlds (not bad)
The Royal Tenenbaums (I give up on Wes Anderson...)
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (AWESOME)
Shaun of the Dead (I love horror comedies about "the mobile deceased")
Lady in the Water (Daniel, Mickey, Michael - I'm so sorry.)

Just remember these were all free rentals.

And now my latest: Red Eye

Ah, "Red Eye." It's a thriller, and it's set on an airplane. My kind of movie! Now, if one were to think I am therefore, by default, excited to see "Snakes on a Plane," one would be very wrong. Maybe "Spiders on a Plane." Oh, but wait, they already did that in 1977. It was called "Tarantulas: The Deadly Cargo"...and I know this, sadly, because I've already seen it.

Anyway, in "Red Eye," the fictitious airline on which our main character flies is called Fresh Air. Ha! My sister and I couldn't stop laughing every time they announced the airline's name. Wes Craven sure has a sense of humor. And it got me thinking...If I were to name an airline, of course I'd have some fun with it.

Years ago, when United Airlines launched their low-cost subsidiary, Ted, I thought it was a genius branding move. And then I joked with friends about what American Airlines might do in response. They would have no choice but to launch their own no-frills subsidiary, Can. Just imagine the slogan: "Come fly the Can."

Tonight, Fresh Air got me thinking again... If I were to start a new Midwestern regional airline, I would have no finer name for it than Dairy Air.

"It's time to fly...Dairy Air."
"Come fly the friendly Dairy Air."
"Something special in the Dairy Air."
"Dairy Air. A whole different animal."
"Dairy Air. Wanna get away?"
"Dairy Air. The winds of freedom blow."
"Welcome to the departure lounge for Dairy Air flight 455. We will now begin boarding from the rear."

Oh, the possibilities are endless... In fact, here are some more.

As suggested by Danny:
"Dairy Air. More room inside."
"To access your account, just click on 'My Dairy Air.'"

And from Mickey:
"Dairy Air. We're gonna blow you away."

I'm open to more brilliant suggestions if you want to share them. If I were to launch this airline with your slogan, I'd gladly send you an honorary Turd Bird or something. It would be awesome.